NOW (2)

You have no idea how long it took me, back then in January, to remember that I was eight-fucking-teen and didn't need to listen to my parents about curfews and house arrests and bullshit like that. I mostly just sat in my room and listened to Delilah on repeat. I think I'll cut out those posts, the weepy ones about responsibility and Tara being mad at me blah blah blah etc.

It's empowering, isn't it? Being an adult. A year ago I could never have done what I've done.

Done. It's a final word, like Over. As long as we remember something, is it ever really over? I twitch every time I see someone -smile- . How can I say it's over?

I think I'm just melodramatic and rambling right now. I think I need to be melodramatic and rambling, though, you know?

I suppose as someone in the 'future' I should leave some sort of cryptic but poignant clue as to what happened but I'm too tired. I don't sleep much anymore. Always on the move.

I'd say I'm being badass but I just want to put as much distance between me and my old life as possible. It's safer for everyone else.

I know you're worried about me. You know who you are. Please, just forget about me. You have a future. You have other friends. Right now I have nothing.

It's safer for everyone that way.